Friday, April 25, 2008 @ 9:55 AM

hunger pangs

"The African children are starving.." The favourite phrase Garene would say whenever Felicia wastes more than half the amount of her food.

Alittle background about these 2 adorable TP friends:
1) Garene Tay - An independent woman. She works exceptionally alot, but claims to be broke because she spends most of them on good food. She is also a very straight forward person, who speaks her mind like nobody's business - but that's something which I admire, because not many would dare to do so. Our timekeeper, the choleric one among us.

2) Felicia Low - A crazy, fun-loving, enthusiastic and crazy vice-captain of TP Blazers (cheerleaders). Extremely rich, which allows her to 'throw' money away. Excuse to not finish her food: Lose weight to be a cheerleader. However, she is always the one who will organise 'outings', like dinners and stuff. She is noisy and dramatic most of the times, but it's good company!

Till now, you should be able to understand Garene's reaction to Felicia's food wastage? Whose side would you be on? I would definitely be on Garene's side.

Choir rehearsals ended 10pluspm today, got a call from Jeslin saying that there is dinner, so dragged my hungry tummy all the way from Somerset to Pasir Ris. The journey seemed extraordinarily long after Joyce and the rest left me all alone on the train towards Pasir Ris. The Forest Berries Lakerol sweets just wasn't able to satisfy the terrible hunger pangs. At that point of time, all I thought of were the African children, who didn't have enough money or food to fill their stomachs. I was also reminded of this picture shown in Media and Society lecture, presenting a vulture waiting by the side of a near-to-skeleton little boy who was finding food in the desert. How sad is that? I was just hungry for that short period of time, but those poor kids had to starve for days! Some to the extent of death.. man, yet we're wasting food which could be their one day's meal!

I understand that sometimes we just cannot finish the entire bowl of noodles or something, because I don't always finish all my food, but I do make effort to try gobbling them all up. Next time when you know you can't finish your food, ask for less rice/noodles, or share the food with someone else.

Once again, don't waste food, because "The African children are starving.."

Thursday, April 24, 2008 @ 12:12 AM

SP3_01

In case you're wondering what is SP3_01, let me tell you. It is one of the many Internet-accessed computers in TP library.

Well, I guess I will be blogging more often here, especially on a Thursday afternoon. I have 3 hours of break before another long slot of psychology lessons. So PLEASE! If you are doing nothing within these 3 dreadful hours, do book me for lunch or something :)

It's the fourth day of school. Slack, yet the horror awaits me.. survey for a whole load of 300plus/minus people, handful of individual projects.. I feel intimidated by the 'smarties' in my class, achieving GPAs of above 3.8! Thought it was kind of freaky to be able to get that seem-impossible-yet-achievable kind of results, but it's actually happening to a few of my current classmates. Okayu never mind, it can add on to my motivation to study even harder, if not, I can say bye-bye to my university admission. Oh by the way, I want to go to SMU.. anyone else interested? Hehe.

Hey! Guess the number of notebooks I have in my bag!
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Answer is: FIVE!

No, I am not crazy, neither do I loveee notebooks that much. It just makes life more organised, doesn't it? Handy tool that everyone else should own. Let's see how I make use of each of them..

1) Tiny yellow notebook - For jotting down any blessings that comes my way.. Thank you God!
2) Red palm-sized notebook - Just started using it not long ago, it's purpose is for any learnings/ insights/ whatever that I get from reading the Bible :) It's still quite empty though!
3) Blue A5 notebook - Sermons, shepherdings, teachings?
4) Artbox planner notebook - planner?
5) 30cents Orange notebook - random stuff, if I couldn't find any other blank paper to scribble stuff down.

You know what! It's time for you to get more notebooks as well.. hehehe. K, maybe thats alittle too many notebooks in 1 bag. (No wonder my bag seems heavier now..)

Hm, time passes so quickly, that I still feel like a freshman, rather than a junior. Or am I just maturing at a slower speed than others? Seriously, it's like a mind block or something. As I look at my secondary school friends, and compare them to what they are now, it seemed as if there was a leap of growth to their maturity (which shows in their dressing, mindset, the way they relate to people and so on), but i'm like the one stuck back in time. hahahaha.. yet again, maybe they are just trying to 'fit' into the crowd, being succumbed to the ways of this materialistic world..

From where I'm sitting, on my left, there is a guy who is so engrossed in playing his black PSP as if he's in the real-life version of the 'war' game. Is PSP that great? Hm, probably the functions.. like can listen to music, storing pictures and all. But till now, I've not really seen anyone using it for other purposes other than gaming. I agree that it is a perfect way of spending spare time, but is that the most fruitful/ productive way? I think it's a waste of money, waste of resources, waste of braincells.. Hm, probably I'm saying all these because I don't have the cash to get it. HAHA! Well, it has always given me the impression that usually only rich people owns one.. Hehe, but on my part, really, I wouldn't spend that lump sum of cash on a PSP. Either I save it up in my nearly-broke bank account, or stuff myself to good food. I'm gonna learn more in my elective - SocioPsych.

Do you know that the short form of Psychology is just Psych? I've always taught it was Psycho..

Alright, think I've posted quite a LOT. 13 minutes left before I gotta log out and drag myself to psych tutorial and lecture. I'm tired! But it's okay, cos I can do everything through Him who gives me strength!


Florence :)

Sunday, April 20, 2008 @ 9:26 AM

schooling..

The start of Term 1 Year 2 is just a few hours away, how am I feeling now?

A mix of grouchiness yet excited for what God has in store for me. I know it is going to be tough, due to the semi-horrendous timetable, juggling of ministry and school work, family time, and the upcoming piles of projects and assignments for various well-known killer subjects. However, I want to grow in God even more, being extra reliant on His strength, and keeping the focus right.

Also, I want to manage my time even better now. Want to make sure that I will set aside time to study, get proper rest and not be stuck to the computer doing meaningless rubbish, and most importantly, having a closer relationship with God. I need to grow so so so so much more!!!

So, for whoever is reading this, please keep watch over my life. yay! thank God for you!

Wednesday, April 2, 2008 @ 10:23 AM

In response to her poem..

PeiQing's poem to me (quoted from her blog post on 15 March 2008):

Once again I thank the Lord for a bimbo like you,
knowing deep within my heart you'll be a bimbo so true.
i never have to wonder if you'll be there when i need you,
cos i know all i have to ask and you're here.
it may not be in person that you share my burden,
for i know in spirit, you share m burden too.
a bimbo i can rely on,
a bimbo who will not quit,
a bimbo who's ever faithful.
so i take this time to thank you,
from the bottom of my heart,
for this friendship that's faithful,
from it's very start.
i know this is a friendship,
that truly will never end,
because it's meant to be,
before it even began!


Aww.. how sweet is sweet.. So in response, I'm gona write you a poem to you as well.

So, this is for you, PeiQing:

As I look back,
I can't even remember when did THIS even start.
All I knew, was that you were just a phone call away,
you were the one who didn't mind my fart.
Okay, maybe not.
THIS is rare, God blessed.
You were patient enough to hear my rantings,
Your words never fail to make my day.
Though we go our separate paths, for now,
I know THIS will not end this way.
Though we aren't talking as much,
I know THIS will still carry on.
A big big thank you to you,
for your simple yet precious touch in my life.
THIS is - our friendship.

@ 8:14 AM

Quoted from "My God Why" by Rev.Leo Douma

This post is for those who are feeling 'abandoned', 'lost' and 'lonely'...

Here goes..

One of the biggest fears of any human being is being abandoned by those we love, being left alone. In our crowded cities of millions, loneliness is what many struggle with. Many look so successful but feel lost inside.

An English doctor once conducted an experiment to study the effects of isolation on people. He built a sound proof room 3x3 meters and suspended it by nylon ropes. Each participant wore padded fur gloves and heavy woollen socks to eliminate the sensations of touch. Special translucent glasses limited their vision. After just 1 hour of isolation, some people found it impossible to concentrate. This was followed by feelings of anxiety and panic. Many just could not stay in that room for more that five hours.

We human beings are social creatures, just like God who is a social being, three in one. We were never meant to be alone. We do not cope with being abandoned, being isolated. That’s why solitary confinement is so tough for prisoners. It’s why children are petrified if they feel lost or abandoned by their parents. It’s why we find divorce, death, migration, all forms of separation, so tough. We need people to share our stuff with. But however we feel about being left alone, no one, but no one has felt the loneliness that Jesus did on the cross, especially when he cried out “My God, my God why have you forsaken me.”

This is the language of complaint, desperate grievance, protest; objection. This is not like the previous words of Jesus on the cross. This time it’s not a prayer of forgiveness or kind words to a thief or his mother.

This time it’s a scream. It is a cry of anguish. It is a complaint, a demand directed at God. This complaint came at the end of a long dark silence. We might think that the crucifixion lasted about an hour- but it took a large part of the day. Jesus’ hands and feet were nailed and tied to the cross at about 9am. At midday everything went black. It was completely dark and silent for three hours. All those hurling abuse were scared into silence. You couldn’t see anything and no one said anything. In the utter silence all you could hear was the struggled breathing of the three crucified men as they slowly suffocated to death. And then at the ninth hour, at 3pm, the silence is broken by a horrible sound as Jesus screams out, almost
roars! It is a deep cry of anguish. It’s a bitter complaint directed at God. There was violence in Jesus’ voice. He exerted himself to raise his voice.

We may have had those very difficult times when we felt forsaken by God, abandoned by God and left in the lurch. There have been times when some of us may have raised
the fist in the air and yelled “God, why”. But we cannot compare those experiences with that of Jesus. Although we may have appeared to have been forsaken by God, in reality he never let go.

“Footprints in the sand”
We look back and see two sets of prints in the sand. But during our most difficult time we see one pair of foot prints instead of two and assume God left us for a while, that he abandoned us when we needed him most. And we ask ‘why God, why leave us when it was tough?’ But in fact during the hard time God was carrying us. God in
his love may put us through hard times for our good, for our spiritual growth, to bring us closer to him. It may not feel that way in the middle of our suffering- but later we see and feel God’s grace as we cling to him. God needs to do this to us from time to time. For the reality is that often we forsake him!

Far too often we abandon God and forget him. Sometimes in our actions and thoughts we outright deny him! And God says ‘My child, why have you forsaken me? Why have you left me out of your life? Why do you forget me so often or push me out?’ Then God has used that harsh experience to bring us back to his loving arms.

But this was not the case with Jesus. Christ did not just feel rejected. He was rejected. Jesus was not going through a psychological experience; he was utterly abandoned. Let’s get it clear. Jesus was completely and totally rejected by God. God had turned his back on his son and abandoned him. God was not just teaching Jesus a lesson; ‘this is for your own good’.

Christ was bearing the full brunt, the entire force of God’s anger and justice. There were no loving arms for Jesus to reach out to. Jesus had never known a time, even before the universe was created that as God’s Son he was not his Father’s delight. Their fellowship had never been broken. The unity of the trinity is an
intimacy beyond human understanding. So often in his earthly ministry Jesus would be in prayer, speaking for long times with his father. But now, this is not the act of fatherly love, but of anger and hatred. Yes hatred! For God hates sin and evil. He loathes it. For sin opposes and rebels against everything God stands for. And Jesus
had become that sin. He had identified himself with the human race, its sin and its evil. He stood in our place.

All the sin of humanity was gathered in a pile, so to speak, and heaped on Jesus. Jesus had never forsaken God as we do. He had never sinned as we always do. He had always been completely obedient and loving to his father. Yet Christ is regarded
as ‘the sinner’.

We were the cause of his complaint. It was our sin that caused him to scream out those words, ours, and that of the rest of the world. We should have been the ones to suffer, not he.

And yet, yet, at the same time grace! There are in these awful words of Jesus cause for hope and praise. Did you notice them? These words of Jesus do not only make clear the extent of our sin and the punishment we deserve. The words also show us God’s answer for our salvation. Listen to them again, carefully: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” Christ was completely forsaken by God his father. But Jesus never forsook his God and Father- not even in hell itself. Even from the pit, in the midst of total evil, rejected by God, Jesus still reached up and called for God! My God! The suffering his father caused him is almost beyond him. But Jesus does not rebel or curse or turn against God. He still calls out “My God, my God…” In the midst of complete evil and total rebellion Jesus is still obedient!

Never will he abandon us. Now it will not always feel that way. In fact even in our own congregation there are too many who feel alone, lonely, battling on their own. In faith they know Jesus loves them and will never let go. But we need to know that truth from the body of Christ as well in our daily lives.

Remember, we the church are the voice of Jesus to express his love, we are his hands to provide his care. If we don’t speak and act in Jesus’ name, as substitutes for the substitute, then there will be those who do not hear Jesus.






It is time to go back to God..

@ 8:04 AM

How can i keep from singing

How can i keep from singing

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne


Lord, thank you :)